How your relationship with yourself is the key to Freedom, Peace and Joy

I want to share with your how your relationship with yourself is your key to feeling free in this world, finding peace within yourself and living a life that is filled with daily smiles and joy.

You'll have heard me say it before and you will hear me say it again and again, your relationship with yourself is the LONGEST relationship of your life. No one else is with you from the moment you are born until your last breath. Know one can know you as deeply as you know yourself and that is why you have to build a relationship with yourself that is supportive, kind and encouraging.

Your relationship with yourself has the BIGGEST impact on you and your happiness. 

And the best news is that you have full choice and power over your relationship with yourself. 

I know we all have experiences in life that have left a mark and things inside us can feel very complicated and painful, but trust me, you do have power over changing this. It will take time, effort and a lot of self kindness and compassion but IT WILL be worth it.

I am here to help, support and guide you on this journey back to loving, knowing and liking yourself abundantly. 

Since birth, I have had a very deep connection with my true self, but like many, through trauma and societal conditioning, I choose to ignore my truth, my uniqueness, my individuality and therefore my individual needs until eventually I was living the right life by society's standard but was deeply unhappy and drowning in claustrophobia.

Have you ever stood in this gigantic world and felt claustrophobic like you were trapped in a box? 

I felt bored and stunted, that my life was a to-do list, not something I was getting to live fully. don't get me wrong i did alot with my free time, when i wasnt dying with depression but i wanted more.

I wanted to be free to spread my wings as big and as wide as I could.

It was a hard decision to leave the 9-5 life and lived in a country that I knew and felt “safe” for me in navigating the rules and regulations ect. 

The truth is I didn't leave it. 

Burnout gave me the push, or should I say completely forces me to make the change.

I go so sick I was bedridden and sleeping 20hrs a day. I couldn't hold my head up when awake or eat solid food. I had to give up all my independence and move back to Ireland to live with my parents. Nothing feels more like failing in life than turning 40 and living back in your childhood bedroom, in the house that you hate because it triggers all your trauma reminders. 

But that's what happened and I do not regret a moment of it. It was very challenging mentally and physically but the healing happened because I was there in that exact spot with my family. Mental health healing I had never expected to be possible and I had the space to focus on my physical health recovery. 

But know that one of my main goals is to never HAVE to move back there again.

I am writing this from a very warm balcony in the south of Italy where a bought the sweetest little home for only €20K. 

I am happy and although I've been physically sicker than I expected I have been happier and more whole than I have in a long time. 

This was all possible because when you lose all that you identify yourself to society with you are left with you, the truth of who you are. 

The gift that severe illness brings is it feels like you have been given a permission to use what healthy, happy free time you have to do what you want, need and love. To let go of “shoulds” because you time is to precious for anything other than needs and wants.

Don't wait for that permission slips!!! Give it to yourself now.

How exactly does your relationship with yourself bring you freedom, peace and joy?

Knowing yourself, really taking the time to face all of you. to work through the baggage, you have collected along your journey in your life so far, brings awareness.

Self Awareness gives you the knowledge and power to be able to decide what parts of YOU you want to keep, to grow and which you want to work on letting go of or changing

Information is power and self-awareness is an abundance of information on you, which is what you need to be able to create an honest open relationship with yourself. 

Another key ingredient is kindness. you have to be kind to yourself on your journey. you can live with a nasty commentator in your head and you don't have to. 

Be conscious of the power and choice you have over your internal world. The conscious effort to change it. Within 6 months of following these steps, you will have a new inner world. I did this conscious work myself in my early 30s and my inner world is a joyous haven and my lifestyle is matching that.

It has been the tool to differentiate between depressions and anxieties voice and mine.

Which has been a lifesaver when suicidal ideation or impending doom messages start blasting in my mind.

Changing your inner world can be done by changing how you speak to yourself and what you say to yourself.

Catch yourself when you are being unkind and negative, and ask yourself how could I have said that in a kinder, more positive or in helpful and polite way. 

Keep catching and correcting yourself until you don't need to anymore, until the inner voice is your very best, most supportive and loving friend.  

The more times in a day you need to catch yourself the more you need to catch yourself because you have let your relationship slide and become frenemy style. 

The bonus of this is the more you start correcting what is acceptable to say and the way you speak to yourself the more you become to realise what is o.k and not o.k from others and this beautiful kind relationship with yourself sets the standard you come to accept from your external relationship. 

Your relationship with yourself is the gift that keeps on giving.

It takes an abundance of courage and kindness to face yourself and all that you may have been over the years as you struggled to be the best truest version of yourself in your world. If this is not something you want or feel you can do alone get in touch and let's do the work together.

This work on your relationship with yourself all adds up to giving your awareness and self connection to hear yourself, what you need, what you want and therefore how you want to live your one precious life on this earth. freedom follows as you can't ignore yourself, you are your very best friend, support and advocate. 

Peace flows when you are living in alignment with your true wants and needs as does joy. but joy is heightened greatly by the relationship you have with yourself because when you live with your very best friend life is always more fun and laughter filled.